Much of the focus we read of teaching chastity is geared towards our daughters. However, our sons need to understand the need to keep themselves pure as much as our young girls. Ignore those worldly messages which say it's OK to watch pornography and sleep with girls before they are married. Such a life creates instability and heartache.
"Only the chaste man and the chaste woman are capable of true love," said Pope John Paul II. The importance of teaching our sons the importance of being chaste can make the difference between a content life and a frustrated one. Here are 4 tips to help parents.
Teach chastity from an early age
We can teach our sons from an early age that those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions. When our sons are young, we can teach them how to take care of their bodies and how to dress modestly. If these lessons are started early, by the time they are teens being chaste will be ingrained in their thinking, and their understanding of right and wrong in treating girls with kindness and respect will be remembered.
Choose the right friends
Choosing good friends is an invaluable tool for sons to stay chaste. From the wisdom of those who look back on their high school life, choosing good friends is the key to staying chaste. Peer pressure can be overwhelming. If your son's friends are leading him down the wrong path, your son will follow. Taking dares to do stupid stunts can be hurtful and sometimes irreversible. Good friends can make the difference in a son's life, which will keep him safe and in good company.
Teach sons how to respect women and girls
There are many girls who dress to get attention. With the understanding that girls are virtuous beings who should take care of their bodies and dress modestly, boys can understand that chastity involves more than physical sex. Chastity involves keeping our thoughts pure and treating women with kindness and respect. The irreverent examples we see in the media should be discussed with our sons in hopes that they can understand the true meaning of treating girls well. Teach correct dating procedures including good manners to your sons so they can understand the truth of what makes a respectful, successful date, and what doesn't. A chaste love is a pure love and sons need to understand this idea when they are teens.
Hold off dating until age 16
This can be so very helpful in teaching sons to stay chaste. There is no pressure to push a relationship beyond its bounds, especially when the maturity level is not high. Sponsor group activities with teen friends to break the ice and feel more comfortable. We can help them understand that chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage as well as complete fidelity to a wife during marriage.
From the blog, Granola Catholic, it is says this about group activities: "Better yet is to arrange group outings of teens that involve an activity so they can get to know each other. It goes without saying that going to parties or occasions where alcohol is available should be avoided." Encouraging wholesome activities for your son and teen friends will go a long way to helping him stay chaste.
The world presents many challenges for youth. One way parents can help is to teach the importance of chastity. It may be hard for sons to avoid temptation, especially in certain situations. Nevertheless, with training from parents they can overcome.