The father of your children may feel his role is not as important as yours, and it's your job to let him know otherwise. Dads are just as influential and important as moms. Here are six things the father of your children needs to hear:
You are a great dad
Dads need to hear that they are great. Dads have insecurities just like moms do. Be direct and tell him that he is a good father. Give him specific examples of times you saw him do something amazing, or heard him say something sweet to your child. Dads often don't get much credit for what they do, and as the mother, you need to tell him often just how great he is.
Our kids really love you
Kids don't always express their love verbally, and it may be hard to tell by their actions. Make sure he knows. Tell him what your daughter said about him, or how your son watches for him out the window until he comes home. Dads sometimes don't get to see all these little interactions, but they need to know about them.
I love watching you with the kids
It is important to tell him how much you love watching him spend time with the kids. If he works a lot, he may not have as much time to spend with them as he would like; so knowing that the time he does have with them matters is valuable. It promotes more interactions between him and the kids, and lets him know how much you love that he loves them.
I hope our kids get your ...
... eyes ... brains ... love for sports. Whatever it may be, let him know that you really want part of him passed along to your children. This is one of the biggest compliments you can give someone. You want your child to be the most amazing person in the world, and if that includes some aspect of him, it shows him how much he matters to you.
I love you even more now
Relationships go through a lot when a child comes into the picture. Couple time may take a back seat to your new little one. It is hard to go through that adjustment, and even when your child grows, it can be hard sharing so much of each other. Let him know that you love him even more now. You love watching him interact with your child. You love seeing parts of him in your child, and as a result, he has reached a new level of attraction for you. This will send him the right message about your feelings, even if it is said while half asleep, covered in spit-up as you nurse your baby.
Often times, the work that a dad puts into his family is behind the scenes. He may not be as hands-on as the mother, simply because he is out of the home more, or he may not be as nurturing as a mother usually is. As a result, he may not get credit for what he really does. It is important to remember to thank your man for the support he provides. If he is the primary bread winner, then he is doing that to support his family. He has to leave the home and sacrifice time with his kids to earn a living. Make sure you acknowledge that. Also thank him for what he does directly with the kids. When he changes diapers, builds blanket forts and assembles bicycles, tell him thank you. Those simple words have a very powerful impact.
All of the above suggestions can really make a dad's day. Kindness, gratitude and reassurance take a small effort to express, but have a big effect that lasts much longer than the time they took to convey.