Marriage is a huge decision that forever alters a person's life. It involves two people coming together and vowing to love each other through both the good and bad times that lie ahead.

But when the "bad" times come, it can be all too easy to start to look for a way out. You may have doubts about the direction your relationship is headed or begin to regret your decision of who you chose to marry.

Eventually, the word "divorce" might even find its way into your vocabulary. While some things can't be reconciled, separating from the person you vowed to spend the rest of your life with should always be a last resort.

Here are 11 things to remember when you start to regret your choice of who you married.

  1. You didn't marry your spouse because they were perfect. You married them for who they were and who they could become.

  2. It takes a lifetime to truly love and appreciate someone.

  3. Divorce isn't the only solution and most issues can be fixed if you are both willing to change.

  4. It is never too late to forgive. Never.

  5. Your spouse used to make you happier than any other human being in the entire world.

  6. Whether they've expressed it or not, your spouse probably has similar feelings to those you are experiencing. Try putting yourself in their shoes and look at things from their point of view.

  7. The most important things in life aren't things at all. Your husband or wife should always be more important than money, a career or any other worldly attainment.

  8. You too have flaws and do things that upset your spouse.

  9. Ultimately, only you and your spouse can make your marriage work-no program, counselor, therapist or anyone else can do it for you.

  10. Retaining your pride or "being right" is NEVER worth ending your marriage over.

  11. Your spouse was once the first and last thought you had in a day. They were your everything. Nothing meant more to you than they did-remember that.

Every marriage is going to have rough patches, of that you can be sure. But it's how you and your spouse handle these hard times that will truly define your relationship. Taking the time to remember and reflect on these 11 points can help put things into perspective. As you focus on the positive qualities your partner has, you'll see that your relationship is still worth fighting for.

Barbara de Angelis is an American author and relationship consultant. She does an exellent job in descring what marriage truly is.

"The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It's a choice you make-not just on your wedding day, but over and over again-and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife." -Barbara de Angelis

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