"It's very inexpensive to give a compliment" - Mark Twain
I grow a garden in my backyard, and it reminds me in many ways of my marriage. If I give the garden good compost, water and plenty of care, it flourishes. When I forget about the garden, even just for one day, the plants start to wilt and the soil begins to dry up. If I let it go unattended for too long, I most certainly would lose some plants and have to put in considerable effort to revive them again. Compliments to your husband are much like garden care.
Life coach Shannon Battle says, "In a world where people often feel alone and disconnected, a simple compliment triggers feelings of self-worth." As you compliment the man you love, you too will feel a true sense of appreciation and achievement as it makes your husband a more confident man. Research has shown that compliments help improve performance in a similar way to receiving a cash reward.
Try using these compliments on your husband and watch his confidence soar:
1. "I believe in you"
What you think of yourself defines your life. So when someone believes in you, you can believe in your potential. Letting your husband know you believe in him, allows him to achieve his true potential.
2. "You are my best friend"
A group at the University of Virginia studied brain scans from 22 different people. Scientists discovered that the brain activity of a person in danger, versus when a friend is, is essentially the same. "Our self comes to include who we become close to," says James Coan, Psychologist and Director of the study. Reminding your husband that you care about him more than yourself can bring you closer together.
3. "I'm proud of you"
Be sure to let your husband know you are proud of him. Build his self-esteem. Never tease him in public or put him down in a hurtful way. If you build him up, he will perform his best for you.
4. "I forgive you"
Don't allow resentment to hurt your marriage. "Studies have found that the act of forgiveness can reap huge rewards for your health, including improving sleep, reducing pain, and reducing levels of anxiety, depression and stress."
Let your husband know that when he has made a mistake, you will forgive, forget and work towards regained trust and admiration.
5. "I trust you"
Let your husband know you trust his decisions, his character, his intentions and his love. If he feels secure with you, he won't go looking for confidence from anyone else.
6. "You're right"
Your husband won't always be right, but when he is it's OK to tell him that. Men want to be acknowledged that they are intelligent. Give him a confident boost like this and you will be the one reaping the benefits as he falls even more in love with you.
7. "You bring me joy"
Aren't we all just looking for happiness? If your husband knows he is the one that adds the most joy to your life, he will continually try and bring happiness to you.
8. "I am attracted to you"
Fan the flame, wives! Just because you're married doesn't mean you should stop telling him how handsome he is to you. You might think he knows that, but don't assume. He needs to know he's the only one you see. This compliment may even lead to a romantic night in.
9. "I respect you"
Men pride themselves on their wives' respect. Remind him often that you support him and respect his decisions and the way he handles himself.
"10. Thank you for helping me"
Don't forget to thank your husband. He wants to help and make you happy, but he also wants to know it means something to you and you don't just take it for granted. Praise him for all he does for you.
11. "I love you"
This is the best compliment of all. Unconditional love is the greatest gift you can offer to your husband. He won't go looking for love elsewhere if he know he has all the love he needs from you.
12. "You are so smart"
Likely, your husband has worked hard the whole time you've been married. Over that time he has gained knowledge in certain skills or trades. Let him know you are proud of his success and how you love the knowledge he has gained.
13. "I love spending time with you"
If your husband feels valued he will choose you over others. Make the time you spend with your spouse meaningful and fulfilling. He will in turn do the same for you.
14. "I am safe with you"
A man wants to protect his greatest belongings. He takes a sense of pride in his strength. Also remind him you feel safe coming to him with concerns, problems and doubts and that you love the way he handles the situation.
15. "I miss you"
Letting your husband know you want him around will make him more excited to be with you. If he knows his presence makes a positive difference in your life he will want to be with you more than anyone else.
Enjoy the more confident, loving man you will soon find after complimenting his greatest strengths.