Holidays and anniversaries are great days for showing your wife you love her, but if those are the only days of the year your wife feels truly loved, there's something going wrong in your relationship. If she has to guess at your feelings the rest of the year or wishes longingly for the days you were first dating because she loved the way you treated her, it's time to make a change.
Making your wife feel loved doesn't take a dinner at a fancy restaurant, a diamond necklace or a soulful serenade beneath the stars. She feels loved from the ordinary things you do every day. Here are five things you can do today to make your sweet wife - your better half, your soul mate - feel more loved.
Initiate the hand hold
You may not realize it as it happens, but as kids come into the picture and you get busier, you stop having as many opportunities to hold your wife's hand. Most likely it's because there's always some other (smaller) hand in it - or a diaper bag, or several sacks of groceries. But at quiet times or in the car, take the time to intentionally initiate the hand hold. It might feel like casual contact to you, but your wife will be acutely aware of the gesture. This might also be the right moment to lean over and kiss her cheek or whisper, "I love you," in her ear. Cue the radiant smile and rosy cheeks.
Turn off the TV, turn down the music and put down the phone
We get so caught up in all our technological pursuits that, sometimes, a day will go by without either of you really making eye contact. You're always seated next to each other watching TV, in the car or at the dinner table, distracted by some form of technology or another.
Anytime you get the chance, turn off all that interference and have a real conversation with your wife. She's probably been wishing she could do the same thing, but somehow it's easy not ever to get around to it. If it makes things easier, turn off your cell phones (don't just put them on silent because you'll still hear them buzz) and put them in another room so you can focus on each other.
Take the kids for a walk
Of all the things your wife really wants, one of them is to have just a moment to herself. Whether she's been at work all day or at home with the kids, she's guaranteed to appreciate any chance she can have to focus on herself and her own interests for once. You can make this happen by offering to take the kids for a walk, getting them (and their noise) out of the house and out of her hair.
Or vice versa - tell your wife if she'd like to get out of the house for a while, you'll hold down the fort while she goes for a walk or treats herself to some other form of rare pleasure. The wife who returns will be a fresher, more relaxed version of herself, more prepared for the stresses life is constantly throwing her way.
Make the bed
There are some chores that, no matter how often you do them, they just have to be redone the very next day. Making the bed is one of these obnoxious chores. It's really a simple, quick task, but imagine your wife's surprise when she comes into the room prepared to make the bed (yet again) and it's already done for her. This simple act can have lasting consequences for your marriage. It reminds your wife you're thinking of her, and she'll probably smile every time she passes the bedroom the rest of the day.
Ask her about her day
Chances are, you and your wife do many of the same things every day. After a while, it might seem trite to ask each other how your days went because they're always the same. There's a difference, however, between asking, "How'd your day go?" which will likely yield a one-word answer and asking, "What did you do today?"
The second question requires a more specific response and should reveal to you what went wrong or what went right in your wife's day. Don't end with this question, though. Follow up with comments about what she did, commiserate with her if something didn't go well, and congratulate or compliment her if something went right. This sincere show of interest will communicate your love as clearly as if you'd told her outright that you love her.
Nothing is more important in your family's life than your relationship with your wife. These small acts of love might seem insignificant in the short-run, but repeated through the years, they will show your wife a level of love and devotion she can't help but reciprocate. Why wait any longer to improve your marriage?