This article was originally published on Patheos. It has been republished here with permission.
"Someday" is a popular word in marriage. We say things like, "Someday, let's go to Europe. Someday, let's do a marriage retreat together. Someday, let's pay off our house."
Those "someday" goals are good, but there are some things in your marriage that can't wait for "someday." They need to happen EVERY day. One day in your marriage without all five of these is one day too long.
In no particular order...
Thoughtfulness is a fuel that keeps a marriage going strong. Most of us were good at showing daily thoughtfulness during the dating stage of our relationship, but as the marriage goes on, thoughtfulness can disappear (which is deadly for a marriage). Don't get caught in the trap of being thoughtful to co-workers and strangers all day, and then giving your "leftovers" to your spouse!
A marriage can't survive without respect. There are practical ways you can show daily respect to each other.
I'm talking about a lot more than just sex here (although sex is very important in marriage). Every day, you should touch each other. Hold hands, cuddle, give a foot rub, put your arm around his/her shoulder. Those warm touches are a daily way to bind your hearts closer together.
Be your spouse's biggest encourager; not his/her biggest critic. Be the one who wipes away their tears; not the one who causes them! Encourage each other every day.
The moment you feel like you and your spouse are each doing your own separate thing instead of operating as a unified team, you need to make some immediate readjustments. Marriage is daily partnership with a lifelong commitment.