He was curled up in bed awaiting my arrival. Then, he called out my name. By the time I responded it was 3 a.m. and he was sound asleep. This occurred several times before my wake-up call. How could I have let it go this far? The pressure of meeting deadlines was so consuming that I sacrificed quality time with my husband.

Life is a whirlwind of constant demands. From managing a household of three children to working full-time as a physician assistant, and running several businesses, I have found that I have not been as fair with balancing time with my husband as I have been with other aspects of my life.

However, I have recognized that after God, marriage is the next thing that should take precedence in my life. In Genesis 2:24, the bible states that a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united to become ONE. If I am ONE with my husband, then why would I give him less than my best? That would mean giving myself less than what I deserve.

So what does it mean to give your spouse "your best?"

1. Honor your husband or wife

Acknowledge that God has entrusted you to honor the man or woman that He has placed in your life. It is your RESPONSIBILITY to nurture your marriage emotionally, physically and spiritually.

2. Time management

If you want to succeed in life, you must be a good steward of your time. Before scheduling your day, first assign a time specifically for your marriage. This is the time where you and your spouse will give one another undivided attention. Now, let's be practical. You may only have a solid 15 minutes to do this. But when you do, shut the rest of the world out. Turn off the cell phones. Turn off social media and television. Have a conversation solely about each other.

For those whose partners are away for extended periods of time, you must get a bit creative. Thank goodness for technology. Now there is FaceTime which enables people to see one another while in separate locations. Set a time where you will both be free to chat without being in a hurry or interrupted. Have breakfast or dinner together over Skype.

3. Make changes for your spouse

Make them feel like they are the most important thing in your world. This is something I personally had to learn. Growing up, my family did not eat together. Mom would cook and we would go to our separate rooms to eat. When Kip and I first married, I would do the same. In time, I learned to please my husband by preparing both of our plates and sitting down to have dinner together. It's not that I didn't care about him, I was just wired differently. However, I was willing to learn and changed my ways to satisfy the man God gave me.

It is important to look at your spouse when they speak to you. Engage emotionally and be sensitive to their feelings. Even if out of your comfort zone, express your vulnerability with a hug, playing with their hair or simply holding their hand.

4. Be spontaneous

It cheers me up when my husband surprises me with chocolate when I get home late from work. It's the "little" things. Here a few pointers.

  • Run to the local supermarket and pick up a bouquet of flowers for your wife "just because."

  • Send texts to your husband throughout the day.

  • Prepare their favorite meal.

  • Go for a walk or take a scenic drive.

  • Make a run to the ice cream parlor and have dessert.

5. Pray, pray, pray

Pray for your spouse DAILY.

  • The world reeks of temptation. Pray the mind of Christ over them.

  • Satan looks to steal, kill and destroy. Pray for God's hand of protection.

  • Pray that your spouse is surrounded by a good counsel of friends.

  • Pray that God will instill creative ideas within your spouse that will cause them to excel in their jobs/ careers.

  • Pray that the Lord will teach them to become good stewards of their time and finances.

  • Pray for healing, emotionally and physically if needed.

  • Most importantly, pray for a deeper yearning of God's Spirit.

We can all benefit from making changes in our marriage.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on Theodora Love. It has been republished here with permission.


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