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Lost your mojo?

You’re not the only one.

Americans are having a record low amount of sex—even less than they did during the Covid-19 pandemic—according to a new study led by researchers at the Institute for Family Studies. This continues the downward shift in sexual activity that has been worrying sociologists and psychologists for decades.

For the report, called “The Sex Recession,” researchers at the IFS analyzed the data on sex and intimacy in the latest General Social Survey produced by NORC at the University of Chicago, which was collected in 2024 and released in May. They found that just 37 percent of people age 18-64 reported having sex at least once a week, down from 55 percent in 1990. The decline is even more striking for young adults: Almost a quarter of people age 18-29, or 24 percent, said they had not had sex in the past year; this is twice as many as in 2010.

Much has been written in recent years about the trend of young people having less sex, attributed to everything from stunted social skills to a rise in internet pornography. Yet the IFS study shows that the same trend holds true for people up to the age of 64, of all sexual orientations, both married and single. (After age 64, there was no significant change in the amount of sex people have, largely because this group reports having sex less frequently to begin with, the researchers said.)

There are a number of decadeslong trends at play, including declining marriage and cohabitation rates. (People who live with a romantic partner tend to have more sex.) We’ve also become so addicted to our screens that we’ve normalized the experience of staring at them rather than interacting with the person sitting next to us. “People are ‘bedrotting,’ ” says Brad Wilcox, director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia and a senior fellow at the IFS, who co-wrote the study.

And now we appear to be having a moment: Although Americans had slightly more sex after the pandemic eased, current rates have dropped even lower than during the lockdown period, when fear and stress killed our libidos. The sex researchers and therapists I talked to believe we are in a pandemic malaise: We’re struggling to rebuild our social lives, navigate a work-life balance and manage a growing sense of uncertainty about the world.

Let’s hear them out:

“We’re experiencing a long-term atrophy of the skills it takes to maintain relationships,” says Shadeen Francis, a sex and relationship therapist in Philadelphia.

“We’re in a heightened fight-or-flight response because of all the chaos,” says Lee Phillips, a sex therapist in New York.

“If you are exhausted and distracted, do you want to have sex tonight? NO!” says Justin Garcia, executive director of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University.

While reporting this story, I talked to people who said that they were having less sex for all the age-old reasons: the exhaustion of parenting, relationship issues or age. But others had more of-the-moment reasons: Worries about the economy, stress about the news or an unhealthy attachment to their screens. (Netflix, Xbox and X all got blamed.)

One couple said they would rather catch up on their sleep than have sex. Several women cited worries about reproductive rights. Quite a few single people explained that they had stopped dating—and therefore having sex—because it was too expensive or disappointing.

“I definitely miss sex,” says Cameron Chapman, 41, a technology writer in rural Vermont who has decided that she’s happier being single. “But I don’t want to give up my independence and freedom for a relationship.”

Unekwu Yakubu, a 35-year-old biochemist in San Francisco, hasn’t had sex since her long-distance relationship ended a few years ago. She says she’d like to find a new boyfriend but is burned out on dating. It’s expensive. The apps are exhausting. And she finds potential matches to be pickier than before the pandemic, less eager to get up off the couch and meet in person.

So Yakubu has decided to focus on her career and social life for now—joining a book club, volunteering, and attending several in-person events a week, such as picnics or open-mic nights.

“These things have a more immediate and positive effect on my emotional well-being,” she says.

We should be careful about letting our sex lives slide, therapists say. Sex makes us healthier—boosting our immune system, relieving stress, and helping us sleep. It connects us to our partner and makes us happier. It can even make us feel as if we have more meaning in life.

They’ve got advice: If you’re single and you would like a partner, focus on meeting people in real-life settings, hopefully doing something you love. If you have a partner, go to bed at the same time. Opportunity fuels action!

And, for heaven’s sake, put down your screen. “You want the first thing you touch when you get into bed to be your partner, not your phone,” says Michelle Drouin, a professor of psychology at Purdue University, Fort Wayne, who studies the intersection of relationships and technology.

Laurie Mintz, 65, says her libido tanked when she was going through a tough time recently, juggling a big work deadline and caring for sick family members. Typically, she and her husband of 40 years had sex every Sunday night, but she no longer felt motivated. “When Sunday came along, I just wanted to keep working or worrying,” she said.

Mintz, who lives in Gainesville, Fla., is a psychologist and sex therapist and knew what to do. She rearranged her schedule to be more efficient and started exercising every day, to relieve stress. She also made herself stop ruminating over things she can’t control.

Most important, she decided to prioritize sex again, telling herself that it’s just as important as everything else in her life. She recommitted to weekly dates with her husband—no skipping, no matter what.

“Sex is like going to the gym,” she says. “Sometimes you feel like you don’t want to do it, but you always feel better afterwards.”

This article originally appeared on The Wall Street Journal.

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