When we’re interested in someone, we often tell ourselves why we should be with that person. When we’re really into them, it’s easy to get lost in the idea of love. It’s great when the relationship effort is mutual, but when that person falls short and wants to make it work, we often make excuses for them, even when the signs are unmistakable and right there in front of us.

With text messaging being a big form of communication in today's age, we wonder how soon it is too soon to text. If you’re always the first person to message the guy that you’re interested in and when you do, he’s slow to respond to you; it may be a sign that he’s just not that into you. If you are the only person putting yourself out there, it may be time to dial it back. Here are five reasons he may not be texting back.

You may be coming off too strong if you’re always texting him first.

Most guys like to have a little bit of a chase. If you’re constantly messaging him, he may take that as you being clingy. No secure man likes a clingy woman, and if he’s feeling bombarded with messages, especially in the beginning stages of talking, you may be turning him off. If you’ve shifted from giving him the space to pursue you and clinging to him for dear life, you may be scaring him off.

When a guy wants to be with you, he will make every effort to show you that he is. There won’t be any confusion. If he’s not putting any effort into taking the lead, he’s just not that into you. Dial it back a little and see if he starts messaging you more. If he starts taking the lead more, it may indicate that he is still interested and realized how much he cared when you dialed back. If he doesn’t message you more, it’s a big sign he’s not interested.

You are not exclusive.

If he’s talking to other people, he’s probably not ready for commitment or a relationship with you. This isn’t personal. If he’s constantly mentioning other people when you are messaging you, he’s trying to turn you off. If he’s not mentioning other women, but you know about them, he’s showing signs that he is dishonest. Either way, it’s not worth continuing to put yourself out there.

You got physical too soon.

Did you and the guy you message already hook up? When you get physical right off the bat, you set the stage for the kind of relationship you’re going to have. While you may not have had intentions of moving so quickly off the bat, he may have preconceived notions about how you deal with your other relationships, even if that isn’t the case. If she got down this way with me, why wouldn’t she get down with someone else the same way? If he’s pushing for the physical only when messaging you, he’s only into hooking up and not worth your time.

Your interests are different.

While there may be a physical attraction, if you and the guy you’re interested in have little more in common than your physical attraction for each other and little to talk about, the relationship is of little substance. This may be a big reason he’s dialing back. You don’t have to be interested in all the same things, but if you guys can’t find common ground when it comes to your basic interests, this may turn off. You want the person you’re dating to share your interests. If you have very little to talk about through text, it may be time to fall back.

You are asking too many questions.

When we’re deciding to jump into the dating game, we want to know that the person we’re talking to is interested in building a future with us. Yet, when you ask a guy too many questions back to back before he has even had a chance to respond, you may be scaring him off. Remember, guys like to keep things simple, and if you’ve only started talking, he’s probably not ready to answer a bunch of questions about the future through text. He’s still getting to know you. If you’re in the early stages, you may want to refrain from a conversation about when you two will walk down the aisle and simply get to know who he is.

Radio silence from the guy you’re interested in is a big sign that the two are on different pages. Maybe they weren’t that interested. Sometimes, while you think someone seems interested, in reality, they might not have been as into you as you thought. The good thing is, you caught the signs early, and you can move on. No need to worry or stay fixated on someone you don’t know. They also may have realized you have a lot of expectations. If you sent them a text after the first date and then continued to send more texts without a response, that may have put them off. They also may simply be busy. People often overlook the fact that some people simply don’t have the time to text all day. If you send them a bunch of messages when they are busy, it may push them away.

Let things unfold naturally. Don’t text needing a response. When you don’t focus on it, it makes texting and dating a lot more enjoyable. No need to make this another source of stress in your life.

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