The internet is where moms can let their (un-showered) hair down. Parenthood doesn't come with an instruction manual, meaning there's no one to tell you that it's not okay to hide cookies in the bin labeled "flour" on the top shelf. Luckily, you can confess your most hilariously embarrassing parenting tips online: anonymous or not, these fourteen mommy confessions hit the funny bone.

Cookie confessions

Catherine Carate via Buzzfeed admits something we all dreamed of doing (or are old pros at): "I take cookies in the bathroom and lock the door." No word yet on how to explain the cookie crumbs on the tile, but I'm sure there's an explanation.


Wash. Rinse. Repeat

Kristina M. knows how real the struggle of laundry is when it comes to kids. For her and her family, it's all about quantity: "We have enough underwear so I only have to do laundry every three weeks."


Phone and/or potty break

"I will ask my husband to keep an eye on our daughter for a minute while I use the bathroom. Normally I'm out in less than two minutes, but sometimes I just sit there looking at my phone."

This couple has got the give and take part of marriage down pat.

Time management tips

One hot momma

"I have taken to eating almost uniformly hot/boring/spicy/weird food because it's the only thing the kids won't mooch."

Too bad chocolate doesn't fall into that category, right mom?

No alarm clocks

One tough workout

"I joined a gym just for the free daycare. I drop the kids off and read magazines and blogs in the locker room."

Flipping pages and scrolling totally counts as a workout, right?

Wait, wait?


Shelly S. knows the secret to being a fabulous and well rested mom: "I taught my daughter to say dadda before mamma so I could make my husband do whatever she's needing."

Caught red-handed

Shower time

Long uninterrupted showers are a thing of the past once you bring home a bundle of joy. Luckily, one momhas a hilarious hack to help all other parents with their shower schedule:

"Whenever I take a shower, I make sure to shave my (arm)pits. That way I can tell how long it's been since my last shower."

Your grown-up address book

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