Marriage is hard work! I wish someone would have told me how hard this marriage thing really was.

Now, don't get me wrong I love my husband so much but sometimes balancing work, the home, kids, your own personal time and your marriage is stressful. In fact, sometimes the smallest issues can put a major strain on your marriage. I personally believe that all marriages are going to have good times and bad times, but it's how you handle the bad times that make your marriage stronger.

1. Quality Time

Drop the kids off with Grandma, hire a babysitter, barter with a neighbor or anything else within reason to enjoy some quality time together. The keyword here is quality! Don't browse Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. Don't talk about the kids! Spend time holding hands, giving each other kisses and enjoying each other's company.

2. Communication Without Blame

If something is bothering you, talk to your spouse about it, but don't blame your spouse! It's easy to blame others, but all that is going to do is shut down the communication.

3. Intimacy

This should go without saying but when we get busy with life, intimacy is usually the first thing to go. While you might not feel like you "need" the intimacy, it really is about more than fulfilling a need. It's about connecting with your spouse and making each other feel loved and wanted.

4. Remember The Reasons You Love Each Other

Turn this into an activity where you each write down all the reasons you love each other, then read over the list together.

5. Stop Second Guessing Everything

I strongly believe that sometimes the problems are in our own head. When we are stressed out we tend to over analyze everything which in turn makes us second guess everything. As long as there are no serious problems in your relationship (abuse of any kind), then just give your spouse a kiss and tell him or her you love them. Don't second guess it!

6. Make Your Spouse a Priority

There are times when my husband feels like everything, including the coffee maker, is more important than he is. This is not OK! Make sure your spouse knows they are a priority in your life.

7. Learn Each Other's Love Language

A few years ago a friend of my husband recommended we read "The 5 Love Languages." Now I'm not going to tell you that this book was a "relationship saver" but it was really eye opening to see how different our love styles were. This has definitely helped us recognize that we each need something different.

Editor's note: This article was originally published on The Classy Chapter. It has been modified and republished here with permission.

Close Ad